2020 Daily Devotion - Day 139

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Story: On August 20, 1989, Lyle and Erik Menendez shot their parents to death in the family home in Beverly Hills. Lyle was 21 and Erik was 18 years of age. They had grown up in New Jersey but relocated with their parents, Jose and Kitty Menendez, when they were in high school. Their father was a hard driving, successful and extremely wealthy man. He was highly demanding of his sons. The sons would later claim they were significantly abused all of their lives – even sexually abused by their father; and their mother was a manipulative, unstable drug addict.

 
There is no excuse for what they did, and it is an extreme example of what happens in families, but it did happen in theirs. During the trial, Lyle Menendez was being questioned by his defense attorney. It seems their father had a philosophy which he would often recite to his sons – a philosophy many in our culture today agree with and follow. It is a philosophy which many parents teach their children. Look as Lyle Menendez recites this philosophy while on trial for his parents’ murder:
 

“Today I will be master of my emotions. If I feel depressed I will sing. If I feel sad, I will laugh. If I feel ill, I will double my labor. If I feel fear, I will plunge ahead. If I feel inferior, I will wear new garments. If I feel poverty, I will think of wealth to come. If I feel insignificant, I will remember my goals. I will be master of my emotions.” Later, while still on the stand, he said his father believed that a “great sign of weakness is to display emotion”.


Too often, people have been turned into machines – the become robotic. But we are humans and we have emotions. And when we are allowed to have emotions, we become more human and every relationship improves in our lives.

We need to make a distinction between being a Care Giver and a Care Taker.  A care taker is someone who is always trying to solve other people’s problems – trying to fix other people. But a care giver allows others to have their emotions without trying to talk them out of them. One of the ways we can do this is to simply listen to others – to listen to our husband or wife without trying to solve their problem and fix them or defend ourselves; to listen to our children and not always find an answer for them, but to just care. Especially during this time of the Coronavirus, we need to be care givers to those in our lives - it will go a long, long way to improve every relationship in our lives. The Bible says:

James 1:19 NRSV
You must understand this, my beloved: let everyone be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger.

Pray with me:
Heavenly Father, help us to allow others in our lives the ability to be humans and not machines. Help us to be care givers to those in our lives and not try to fix them or solve their problems. The good news is fixing problems is Your job, and You have just asked us to be care givers. In Jesus’ name. Amen.  
 
Yours because of Him,
Pastor John R. Steward
Senior Pastor
Mount of Olives Church

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